There is no question that you might at times need an impromptu dinner fork door lock. For example, let’s say you’re rent an Air B ‘N B, perhaps in Spain and the guy your renting from turns out to be a psycho. Yep, this happened. You’d need a dinner fork door lock right away then. The only problem is…who in the hell carries around a vise?
Here are the steps to eat your take out and then lock yourself away —
Mark the fork at the depth of the latch hole. That’s a real thing. I’m not getting nasty.
Find a vise. Put your fork in the vise almost up to the latch hole marks.
Bang the shit outta your fork until you have a bend at a 90 degree angle.
Get a hacksaw. A saw that cuts metal, whatever that’s called, and hack away the handle. Hopefully you tour around with one of these just like you did with the vise.
Make sure the hacked off handle goes in and out of the in between prong holes like some kind of effed up utensil porn. In fact, someone make a gif out of this. Start at 2:24. I’m too tired!
Then attach your bonkers lock to the door right next to the perfectly good lock that you bought at Home Depot. No one will question the sanity of that.
And that’s it. A perfectly functional lock, which is totally reasonable to carry around with you…especially if you’re going to stay at any janky seeming b n’ bees.